“The story of life is quicker than the wink of an eye, the story of love is hello and goodbye…until we meet again” Jimi Hendrix
New Year’s Eve might be the best natural medicine against procrastination. We all hurry up to close unfinished business, to wrap up our lives until then, come up with the “output”, see whether we have been “naughty or not” and make sure that when the year restarts, it finds us fresh, relaxed and ready. A week later, most of us, are back in the daily routine and our new year resolutions end up in the back of our drawers. Anyone who has ever started a “Monday diet” knows that unless the mind makes the decision to change eating habits, nothing else changes.
Once the switch turns though, that’s it. It’s over. The circle closes.
Closing a circle is the same with saying a real, true, full of heart “goodbye”. Being it either to a person, a relationship, a stage in our life, a job, a friend, a relative, an old part of ourselves, the circle actually closes not by a deadline, which is set by circumstances, by calendars and other external events, but when our heart and mind decide that it is time to do so. When we, on our own, most of the times alone at a rare moment, we reach to the conclusion that it is now time to let go, to accept that the past belongs to the past and decide that we are ready, regardless of how scary it is, to live without. Without that or the person we had build our daily routine around.
A good friend of mine, an ex-colleague from Czech Republic, at the last day of our team’s work, had said “There are days of joy, there are days of laughter and fun, but this moment is a day, which I am going to live and experience it as it is, a day of closing my circle with you and the day of saying my goodbye. So allow me, to experience it with a feeling of sadness, nostalgia for the beautiful times we spent together and a bit of “fear” that I may not be able to experience something similar for some time.” I bring these words to my mind many times since then, especially when I catch myself “fighting” against a feeling of sadness. Because the world we live in is teaching us to experience joy, laughter, success in its full intensity and does not talk about taking time to go through the bottom curve of the spiral, the failure, the sadness, the grief.
How many times do we really give credit to the moment and allow ourselves to emerge in it, experience it with our full emotions? And how many times do we allow ourselves to be so vulnerable and weak to let go and leave ourselves in emotions of sadness and of appreciation of the goodbyes we decide to tell in our lives?
Because the best goodbyes are the ones that are told from a distance. Exactly when the presence or the thought of the other becomes no longer necessary and when we, alone, decide to switch our mind and heart and live at peace with the absence and the end.
When we decide to say goodbye to the year that ends are we really comfortable and ready or do we force ourselves to do so? And if we close, do we really, authentically do it and move on or do we leave unfinished business, which haunt us and hinder us from staying committed to the self we want to be and we see manifested through our New Year Resolutions?
Saying goodbye and closing our circles is an act of love first of all, to us.
To our soul, to our heart, our mind and our peace. Closure happens when it is meant to happen and has nothing to do with the presence or the action of someone else. As opening a circle is done by us, closing it is also an action that we owe to ourselves in order to be able to welcome the new.
For the new calendar year ahead, I wish that we all have the courage not only to open new circles, to start, to welcome, to say hello, but also to close, to leave to the past, to say goodbye to the people and to the parts of ourselves that have reached their purpose and end. More completing and less incomplete-ness from now on.